Found via the Strib: the Wall Street Journal scouted out both Five Restaurant & Street Lounge and Masa in an article called "Where to Eat This Fall". I wonder if that’s stressful; to have the WSJ write about how awesome your restaurant is going to be before it even opens.
Five actually is open now, at least partially, which I didn’t know until reading this article tonight. Andrew Zimmern had mentioned to me a while back that it would be opening soon, so I was watching for it. But I couldn’t find it. Then I saw this ad on Craigslist, looking for hosts/hostesses for a new restaurant at 2917 Bryant, and just knew that had to be it. I drove over there yesterday, but must’ve whizzed right by the address, because I still didn’t see it.
Doy, it’s in the old police station. I’m not a dumb girl, I just didn’t see past the cop shop.
Also in the Strib: Christian Johnson, owner of the Spyhouse on Nicollet, is opening a diner down the block called Bad Waitress Breakfast Joint & Coffee Shop. Should’ve just named it Joe’s Garage. Honestly, have you had worse service? After tonight, I’ve vowed to no longer eat there.
My most regular dining companion lives across the park, so we end up at Joe’s every so often when all other destinations are exhausted. Right off, the server tells us she’s having a bad night and that she’ll be back in a few minutes to take our dinner order because she’s too busy right now. Okay, fine, she’s dramatic, whatever. A few minutes after we do order, she stops back to ask me again what I’d wanted. This doesn’t upset me so much, even after I realize that she’d taken the time to clear two tables in our section before stopping by again.
My lasagna came out before my salad; small mistake, no big deal. This happens all the time, as I seem to be one of the only people left on earth who regularly orders a salad with dinner. I told server #2 (server #1 was somewhere having a nervous breakdown) that I had the mixed greens ahead of my entrée, so he took it back and brought me the salad. However, maybe 4 bites into the salad, he comes back, nonchalantly drops the lasagna off on the corner of the table and sneaks away. Perhaps thinking I didn’t see him, or hoping I would just plow through the rest of my salad and be forever grateful that I didn’t have to wait one single second, or put my fork down, or even chew and swallow between plates.
Seriously, grr. That really bothers me, being rushed along while I’m trying to have a meal. Last time I checked, Joe’s Garage wasn’t going for the short order kitchen appeal. Don’t ask me what exactly it is they’re going for, but I’m pretty sure that’s not it.
As I’m eating my entrée, I look over at the kitchen and notice that the chef, too, is enjoying his own dinner. That’s right, he’s got half a burger in one hand and is tossing a salad with the other. Excuse me, but isn’t that some sort of health code violation?
I’m more than slightly annoyed at this point.
Server #1 reappeared looking refreshed after wrestling with suicidal thoughts in the ladies’ room, so I asked her to clear the empty bread basket and plates while I was finishing my lasagna. My friend asked for more water. I didn’t think I needed to ask for more, since my glass was also empty, but apparently I thought wrong. She came back and slid just one glass across the table, in his direction. Yes, I said slid.
I won’t bother talking about the food at Joe’s. Everyone’s been there, multiple times, so we all know how average it is. I won’t hypothesize as to why the place stays in business. It’s right across the street from The Walker, so it’s not going anywhere. I just can’t believe the service sometimes. Most of the time, actually. I mean, it’s a f**king anomaly, how consistently horrible it is.